I'm quite a lucky little girl.
I know the majority of my vocabulary words because Ryan and Jonathan had used them so often around me...
I'm lucky in other ways...
If I'm so lucky, then why am I so reluctant to reciprocate the love that I am lucky to receive?
Perhaps...I don't belong in that world at all. Maybe he wants me in that world, in his world, but I can't! I couldn't possibly. I don't fit. I don't belong.
It hurts me though. To not be a part of all his laughter and revelry. Is it wrong for it to hurt so much? Is it wrong for me to want so much? I thought perhaps only to hear his voice... but then, I'm not sure... It only made everything that much worse.
Why is it always so hard to let go... For the people that it's hard to let go... Is it because you still want to hold on?
1 comment:
I don't want to let go. If this fact guides you, let it. If it does not influence you at all, let your irrational side be tempered by your rational side. I love you, but it is not luck. It is me. I have given my heart to you. I trust you to do what you feel is right for you. -Ryan
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