Angry At The World.

Stupid thing to be angry right?
I can't let my anger out. I don't know what I'm angry at.
My sister yelled at me, and I almost attacked her. Instead Ijust slammed the door on her face.
I can't let any of my anger out. I can't hit anything. I can't tell anyone. Who could understand if I don't even understand why?
All I can do is cry. And write. Then again writing doesn't help. If I hit anything right now it'll break, or I'll hurt someone or myself. What's the point anymore?
I already do so much to hurt myself mentally and emotionally, what more will physically do?
Then again I do abuse myself physically, just through other means.
I dont' have an outlet anymore. I don't have anywhere to go when I'm angry.
How can I go to my family when they're a factor in my anger?
My true friends can't be there when I cry alone in the dark.
When they are there they make me so happy, but they can never get rid of this hatred.
I hate myself. I hate my family. I hate the government. I hate my teachers.
I hate the world for being the way it is. I hate life for being the way it is.
And i'm not doing a thing to change it.
I'm just crying and forcing my thoughts out through my fingers.
That's why I love the dark.
It doesn't only hide me, it hides the rest of the world from me. In the light you're so exposed. You see everyone, everything, all of it is revealed to you.
Why can't I be ignorant?
Why can't I be normal?
Why do I have to smile so much?
Why do I have to lovce, to feel emotion?

My head is exploding. My spasms are acting out. The room is spinning. In seconds there will be darkness again.